Part one
When you get out, everything is different.
Even though it had only been eighteen months, he felt like the world had moved on and he was running to catch up. He tossed the folder that had been carrying around all day on the ground, the finely printed resumes scattered in the wind
Maybe 3 weeks ago he would have cared.
Tomas Alexander rolled his clear grey eyes as the papers circled and floated away, he put his cigarette out and headed into the tiny convenience store. He only needed a bottle of water but lingered because of the air condition, certainly a luxury during the torturous heat wave that had hit town.
He left the store feeling a little better and decided to take the scenic route home. Home in this case was the former Sleep-Away Motel that had been converted into apartment homes when Mr. Roland realized no one stayed in the River District for just a few nights. Once he reached room 3B, he knocked.
A peek through the half turned blinds and the one room apartment appeared empty with a few clothes scattred on the floor. He was startled when the locks turned and waited a while before opening the door.
The thick warm air in the apartment almost made the outside seem cooler. His wife was adjusting heself back on the floor trying to put back together a fan. Her long brown hair was pulled back into a messy ponytail; she was wearing a thin linen dress with straps that slid down her shoulder.
“Did you get rid of all of them ?”, she asked trying to remove something stuck in the fan’s blade.
“There gone, yes”, he said which was partially true, “they sort of blew away . . .”
“Shit”, she had mangled one of her long finger nails in the fan’s grate and then turned her attention back to him, “It cost me 7.00 dollars to print those plus the cost of paper, you know”
“No one wants so hire an ex-con, Love”
“You’re not an ex-con”
She didn’t want to belive he was an ex-con, but when it came down to it he had spent 18 months in prison for drug possession with intent, which in his family was a rite of passage even if he was just covering for his mother.
The only furniture in the room was a bed that years ago
folded into the wall and a kitchen table but somehow they always found
themselves sitting on the floor.
“Angeline called me today”, she said ignoring his advances
“The bitch of c-“
“Watch it”, she warned. “She said she couldn’t pay for my school anymore”
“Couldn’t or wouldn’t unless you came running home from the good for nothing boy you married ?”
“The point is”, she continued, “this is why you have to take getting a job seriously”
“Maybe you should go back. . .I know how much you need school”
What he meant was he knew how much she needed it as an outlet from living on borderline poverty and the free counseling the school offered.
“You need me more”
He wondered into the kitchen and admired her from a distance; concentrating on her lips as she blew her freshly painted nail dry. They hadn’t lived (or known) each other long but there was one rule he had to follow;
Look but don’t touch
She layed down on her side and turned the radio on looking over her homework, now that the fan was working. She was beautiful but she was going to be the death of him. He just hoped he wouldn’t die a virgin.
+++
“I did not leave the
iron on”,
She tried to re create her steps from that morning, she had started her day on the wrong foot when she woke up alone, she had been planning to wear a button up but with the record 103 degress she had decided to wear a halter dress and bring a bolero jacket for when she was at work, but had she unplugged the iron ?
Her train of thought was interrupted when a sheet of paper was dropped on her desk. She looked up at her professor who was making her way to the student behind her. She turned the test over staring at the circled number.
“forty-five”, she said mentally kicking herself
With her test in hand she raced out the door hoping to make
it to work on time. Dr. Amherst office was familiar ground to
She hated to separate her life into before and after, but that’s how it was
The waiting room was empty and Margalise, the morning receptionist, walked out from the back.
“Good, you’re early”, was all she said looking into a mirror on the desk, “I was just finishing up lunch.”
“Of course”,
She never had to wonder why the other receptionist made more
money than she did, but she wondered if they knew the word discretion. While
Margalise recovered from embarrassment
When she finally arrived home, the door was slightly ajar. They never locked the doors, it was easier considereing the apartment didn’t come with keys. She walked in to hear the shower running.
The kitchen table was littered with mis matched pieces of paper, all sketched with bits and pieces of scenery, most of it pleasant; flowers, faces and words. Other times they could be dark; knives, cages, monsters. The steam from the shower rolled out from the bathroom causing the temperature to rise.
She walked over to close the door but opened it a little. He didn’t see her and probably didn’t hear her come in, her heels muted by the carpet. He was sitting on the shower floor fully dressed underneath the stream of water.
“Tomas?”,He didn’t respond, his hand covering wrist.
She turned the water off and shook him to see if he was awake. He opened his eyes and smiled at her. It was an uncomfortable smile an almost wicked one. She stumbled out of the bathroom and didn’t have to look long to find what she was looking for underneath the sketches; A pile of used needles sitting on the kitchen table next to the salt and pepper.
Before she could touch one a wet hand grabbed her and pulled her back. She turned around and slapped him with her other hand. He let her go and began removing his wet clothes.
“Don’t touch anything, Love”, he said kissing her
+++
The scene had played out like a distant memory from his childhood. How many times had he seen his father take shit out on his mother. Not that he would ever hit Sofia but he understood the urge.
He felt her cool breath on his hand and he placed his thumb on his mouth parting her full red lips, they contrasted well with the black of his nails. He pulled his hand away and went back to his aimless drawing of scenes and words, but all of them seemed to revolve around her.
Tomas dropped the pen and papers on his side of the and pulled the last Pall Mall out of the carton.He placed it between his lips and felt the flicker of heat as she lit the end with his vintage silver lighter. Something about eye-contact always made him uncomfortable, but he could stare at her right into her eyes for hours and feel something different. She made him into a believer of love at first sight.
“I’m sorry”, he finally said, “it was a mistake . . .I just. . .”
He expected her to say I know or offer some kinds words, after all it was her kindness that made him fall in love with her.
“I desrve better than this”, she said, “I gave up my life, safety and friends to be with you”
The words felt like venom but she kept on going, “you’re not in prison anymore, Love, in this world there are rules”, she moved closer and whispered into his ear, “mine”
“What about happiness?”
“What?”
“you said you gave up your life, safety and friends but what about your happiness, did you give that up too ?”
He put the cigarette out in the cup of tea she was holding
and dimmed the lights,
Part 2
There was always something special about Angeline Duval’s
house.
Angeline was sitting out front wearing white floral wrap dress, beside her on the porch was Captian Samuel. Even though Samuel and Angeline had been married for a year he spent most of his time away at sea, leaving his two children from a previous marriage and he and Angelin’s adopted 2 children and Angeline’s other 2 foster children in he care.
“Oh, I’m so glad to see you”, she said giving her a hug and leading her to the porch.
Tomas, relcutanly followed her. He was willing to make amends for her sake but Angeline and Severine wouldn’t have it.
“Where are the kids ?”, she asked noting the unsual silence
“They went out for the day, you know how it is. . . Severine’s in the back !”
They followed her down the cobblestone path to the landscaped backyard. A small pond in the center with large flowers floating in it was surrounded by willow trees and lanterns, highlighting the darkening sky. Severine was wrapped in the arms of a gorgeous, yet familiar young man.
“
“You look familiar”, she said shaking his hand. Upclose she was shocked at how handsome he was, dark brown eyes and a perfect cut jaw and a smile that could make girls swoon.
“I’m sure you’ve seen me around Angeline’s”, he said, he had a smooth voice too.
She squinted her eyes before it hit her.
“Oh, your in those ads”, she turned to Tomas, “he is the face of menswear. . .wow you look. . .”
She decided to stop talking and let go of Holden’s hand. Clearly he had been given the ignore Tomas memo before hand.
Lucinda, The new kitchen lady, as Angeline liked to put had made an excellent 3 course lunch that everyone raved about. As Angeline bought out the tea she handed a cup to tomas with a smile.
“Have you found a job yet ?”, she asked
“No”, he said, pulling
“Well”, said Angeline ignoring the comment, “Sammie and I
just remodeled the upstairs,
“Actually”,
“
“I know-“
“I don’t think you do”
“My mother wouldn’t feel that way”,
“I don’t think your mother is one to be making desicons right now”
“What the hell,
He followed her out the neighborhood and down the street wondering if she was planning on walking the 15 miles back to the bus station. She finally stopped to take her heels off.
“My mother”, she said
“I thought your mother was dead”
“My mother”, she started again, “crashed her car into the living room of her ex-boyfriend and his wife. She was irrational like that. . .it was what I loved about her.”
“
“They locked her up, told her she was crazy. . . that she wasn’t a fit mother”
“Do you really wanna trade crappy childhood stories ?”, he asked, “because we both know who will win”
She rolled her eyes knowing no matter what her mother did, Angeline had made it better.
“I should know better than to play this sick-game with you”, she said
“Come on, it’s not that far of a walk to the mall”
He knelt down and picked her up, hesitating so she could grab her shoes.
“Don’t drop me”
“Don’t worry, Love”, he said, “I’ve carried burdens heavier than you”
+++
“It’ll be okay”, he told her leaning her back on the cool leather.
“Is it going to hurt ?”
He smiled
“Yes”
He loosened the silk ties from around her blouse, a bit disappointed at the lace camisole she wore underneath. He lifted it up a few inches running his finger over her smooth skin, much to the amusement to the man standing behind him,
“Remember those letters I used to write you, Love”, he whispered in her ear. She nodded, “remember how they made you feel”
“Yes”, she said
“just think about that”
She took in a quick breathe as the needle pressed into her
skin, leaving a dark mark as it dragged against her skin. He found himself
utterly distracted by the way she breathed through the pain. He pressed the
needle in harder for color but he also wanted to see if he could get her to
moan louder.
Soon it was like he was sitting at home, pen and paper in hand. The curves color and shading all came natural to him and unlike his sketches this was permanent. An hour had gone by before he looked up.
“Done”
He backed away from the table as the manager inspected his
work, but his eyes seemed more focused on
“A fairy, how original”, hummed the manager
“It’s an Angel”, corrected Sophia re-tying her blouse, “Is he hired or not?”
“Impressive”, he commented, “Even for your first time, your work is original. . . “
“I’m inspired”, Tomas replied putting his wedding ring back on.
“Alright, I’ll give you commission plus tips, then we’ll see how things go”
“Thank you, sir”, he said shaking his boss’s hand.
He couldn’t remember the last time something had made him smile.
“ I told you, you could do it”, said
“I know, I think it helped to have a pretty girl by my side”, he pulled her into a sudden and passionate kiss.
“God”, she said breathlessly
“You know what I Want to do ?”. he whispered in her ear, “I wanna take you home and make love to you”
He didn’t miss the slight flush to her face when he made the statement, but he knew it was a wasted effort, but still.
“well, how about a used car instead ?”
“Only if the seats go all the way back ?”
“deal”
PART 3
She quit school, point blank, and as much as Tomas knew
H worked long hours to save up enough money so she could go back. The manger, Judson, was somewhat enamored by Sofia so he didn’t minds if she visited him during late hours as the shop was open 24 hours. Perfect timing for drunk teenagers to make stupid expensive decisions.
Judson had given him the key for the graveyard shift and left a few beers in the breakroom and promised to stop by before 9am to relive him. He worked on some sketches most of which featured brown eyes and a soft smile.
He heard the jingle of the front door and put out his cigarette before walking to the front, Tomas glanced at the clock in the hallway, it read 2 am.
This should be fun, he thought
He stood eye to eye with the last person he ever expected to see in this shop.
“Severine Duval”, he greeted her, wondering if she would acknowledge him
She looked around the shop , twirling a strand of luminous blonde hair with glitter still in it from whatever party she had ditched. The light purple dress she wearing flowed with each step she took She flipped casually through a design book with his name on it.
“These are good”, she said stopping at one particularly ornate one featuring a bleeding rose whose drops spelled out the word 'surrender’, “ I want this one”
“Are you sure your mother would approve ?”, he asked leading her into the back
She laughed, clearly Angeline now had a reputation of being to strict. As far as he knew at 19 Severine had inherited quite the workload learning to run her mother’s company while being the poster girl for cosmetics.
“I don’t care if she approves”, said Severine
She seemed certain and looked him right in the eyes when she said it, very few women could look him right in the eyes considering he was over 6 feet tall. He found it intimidating.
“Where do you want it ?”
“Let’s see”, she seemed to be giving it some thought and pulled the sleeves to her dress down revealing a dark red silk bra, “How about here”
He stepped closer to her, inspecting her for any cuts and bruises
“It’s perfect”
He maybe thought on second before their bodies crashed together, her warm slick lips against his.
Shit, shit, shit
He kept saying to himself but it didn’t stop him from lifting Severine on to the table forcing her into a deeper kiss. How long had it been since any woman had looked at him like that. He finally felt the passion he held for his wife returned. She had/would never kissed him like that.
He groaned as she ripped his shirt open, her hands running over his inked body. His newest one ,an angel, burned as she touched it.
“Shit”, he pushed her away
“What is it”, she asked calmly placing a leg around his waist
“You know exactly what the fuck it is”, he spat back at her, “you should leave”
“What about my tat-“
“Get the fuck out”
She didn’t scare easily.
“Look, I’ll admit that you have issues, we all do.
She stood in his way for a while with her disheveled hair and sumged make-up. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t attracted to her, but it was only physical. Wasnt's it ? She left quickly but with a staggering confidence.
He called in another one of the artist and dragged himself home at 6 am, ripped shirt and all. He had to see her, he had to explain. She was just getting ready for work now that she was working full time on weekends.
“Hey, Love”, she said emerging from the bathroom, make- up free. To him she was beautiful. She noticed the ripped shirt, but commented on his new tattoo instead, “you just love that employee discount”
“
“Yeah, she told me. She was at some party and go lost.. . but you should know that she said you helped her find directions.”
She went to put her make up on, leaving him dumbfounded and seriously considering getting a cell phone. He watched he shuffle though the closet looking for a pair of heels to match the tight beige pencil skirt and top she was wearing.
She poured herself a large cup of coffe from the coffee maker she had bought herself as a 7 month anniversary gift.
“Wanna drive me to work ?”, she asked searching for the sugar
“We kissed”
“what ?”
“I kissed—we—Severine and I”
“Oh, so your shirt”
“Nothing happened”
She kept her back to him and then went to look for the sugar, slamming the cabinet and anything else she could on the table.
“Fuck you”
“
“Fuck you”, she said again
“
“Is that what you want ? Cause I have my god-dammed reasons-“
“I know”
“I’m leaving”
“You are coming back ?”
“I live here don’t I”
END OF SECTION ONE