Dark Angel

Dark Angel

 

“You did this to yourself “she said as she paced around the hospital room, “Angeline was just trying to protect you”

 

Sofia couldn’t tell if Séverine was angry or if she was putting on her big sister /best fried routine. Séverine seemed uncomfortable in the hospital room, despite all the embellishments Angeline had added.

 

It was true Angeline had been trying to protect her, but Sofia was stubborn and more importantly unhappy.

 

For six months Sofia had been out of the hospital, she had barley managed to graduate from high school, considering all the days she missed because she had a slight headache and Angeline would rush her to the hospital fearing that there was something wrong with her..

 

With the help of Paige and Séverine they had convinced the school to let Sofia do work over the summer and she had received her diploma in the mail. Everything was looking up.

 

 Angeline was celebrating the opening of her 50^th department store. She was having a party downtown, Angeline ordered Sofia to stay home but it was a nice summer day and she couldn’t remember the last time she had been at the local bookshop/café Cups and Saucers. Since she hadn’t learned to drive just yet she took the Petal Express Bus. After all they had just made the buses scented!

 

She took the number 23 towards downtown. The bus was crowded and she peeked out the window as the bus looped on Coleman St. by the bridge again

 

I must be lost, she thought, surely they should have been downtown by now. She strained to look at the map, not wanting to loose the only seat left on the bus.

 

“Excuse me”, she said to the kid standing in front of the map,  “when do we reach downtown”

 

The kid flicked her off and she wanted to do the same but she wanted to get off the bus before it crossed the bridge. Bracing the metal pole she stood up so she could see the map. The lines blurred so she stepped closer, one more step . . .

 

The bus hit a speed bump and she tripped of her own feet. He nails scratched and slid off the pole. She felt her leg twist at an odd angle and the cold sound of her head hitting the sticky floor.

 

Black and white flashed and she heard people trying to pick her up, while others exited the bus as the sirens went off.

 

+++

 

Séverine still paced when Angeline walked in, she and LaRue had been arguing . . . as always.

 

LaRue said Sofia had a stroke and was rushed to the hospital just in time but as everything became clearer some things hadn’t.

 

Everything felt numb, her face was heavy and hard to move and she couldn’t feel her broken leg.... or her other leg. She listened patiently as LaRue told her  that she would have to undergo Stroke Rehabilitation to be able to speak or walk again. In other words Petal Brook was her home and again and Séverine was blaming her.

 

“I have to go”, said Séverine, “But Angeline will be by tomorrow after she finalized adopting Holli and Ben.

 

She wanted to ask who Holli and Ben were but it didn’t really matter. There was a touch book in front of her. She placed her right hand on it and tried to press the apple button. The computer voice would speak and she would have to repeat the word. It was two for one.

 

She tried for an hour to press the apple, hating that her new life goal was to say the word apple she gave up for the night.

 

+++

 

Nurse Golden was quite a figure. She was Sofia’s personal nurse and full of energy. She sang her own little rhymes and literally became Sofia’s hands and legs. She cleaned, fed and talked with her. She even helped her with her physical therapy and speaking.

 

After a while she began to see Nurse Golden more than Séverine or Angeline. Angeline said she was training Séverine to run the corporate office and they were really sorry, but she could barley stand to see herself like this.

 

“APPLE”, said the book

 

“Apple”, repeated Nurse Golden as she finished adding one last curl to Sophia’s new wig.

 

Sofia managed to open her mouth but no sound came out and Nurse Golden smiled because that was progress. Nurse Golden turned down the TV and started the nighttime routine when there was a knock on the door

 

Nurse Golden shuffled to the door and welcomed in a tall stranger.

 

“Sofia? This is Allen, “He’s a new assistand here”

 

Allen was tall with premature graying: he seemed shy and timid with striking green eyes. It would be nice to have some male friends here, she thought.

 

“Now”, said nurse Golden removing the wig “I’ll put this away and Allen you can turn of the T.V, dim the lights . . .you know “

 

He nodded and waved to Nurse Golden as she waltzed out.

 

“Hello, Sofia”, he said, he had a deep voice that was almost soothing.

 

He did the nightly routine and he talked the whole time, he told her about his day and how happy he was to be a nurse but it all seemed so rehearsed. He dimmed the lights and as he left he whispered

 

“You’re perfect”

 

+++

 

Sofia didn’t think about Allen after that and she hardly ever saw him except during her daily ride down the hallway and through the parking lot. He always seemed to be looking for something.

 

That night rain began to fall, being on the 5^th floor it thundered on the rough. And the lightning even seemed brighter. Nurse Golden said she had to go home early because she was worried about her children but Allen would watch her.

 

Allen checked on her a few times that night but she never went to sleep the thunder was too loud and her room became very dark and quiet.

 

The power had gone out. The silence was strange yet welcoming. Allen came in and placed some candles around the room and she was thankful for the light.

 

“I’ll sit with you”, he said, “I know you’re scared, so am I”

 

She liked that and tried to relax knowing she wasn’t alone. The dim light and the rumble of thunder made the night seem almost romantic. He kissed her forehead, which was kind of sweet he didn’t think of her as diseased and crippled. Then her nose and very quickly her lips, she assumed it was dark and it had been an accident but he did it again.

 

He held her right arm down and kissed her again removing the thin hospital gown she was wearing.

 

She wished she could talk or tell him he had the wrong idea. He didn’t touch her but he seemed to be looking or admiring her body.

 

“You’re perfect”, he said

 

Perfect for what, she wondered.

 

+++

 

It turned into a game with Allen, he would kiss Sofia when no one was looking or speak sweet nothings to her when he washed her.

 

Nurse Golden didn’t notice and certainly had not reason too.  Sofia never realized how off in her own world, Nurse Golden could be. She sang her songs, helped Sofia with her rehab and still didn’t notice the concern in her eyes when Allen walked by.

 

He started visiting her at night more often. He told the other nurses that Sofia had been pulling out her IVs and he wanted to watch her. She always pretended to be asleep as his staring lead to touching. Sometimes it hurt and sometimes she was able to sleep through it and could pretend in was a nightmare.

 

One night he didn’t touch her. Instead he removed all her tubes and wires and placed her on the floor. Sofia liked the cold sensation on her back, it was nice to feel something; she kept up the charade of being asleep as he undressed her.

 

She felt his hands on her thighs and squeezed her eyes tighter, he must’ve noticed.

 

“Don’t be scared, Angel”, he said

 

He didn’t say anything else and she didn’t cry.

 

The next morning when Nurse Golden walked in singing she cried.

 

+++

 

She wanted to get better so she could kill him. That was her new goal. She watched TV with Nurse Golden trying to repeat the dialogue from the television program or answer questions on Jeopardy!

 

She tried not to let Allen’s visit weaken her spirits and when she was finally able to tell him to stop he slapped her, but that changed everything for her.

 

She would say words and he would get upset but he couldn’t leave any marks on her. Soon she stopped seeing Allen and Nurse Golden told her he had a new patient down the hall.

 

She feared for the new patient and sometimes prayed for the girl down the hall. Sevérine came to visit more and she found herself getting stronger without Allen weighing her down.

 

As Sevérine and Paige talked about school and work and boys she wondered if she was ever going to find a life outside of Petal Brook and while her release date became closer she began to get scared. Could she have a life outside Petal Brook and would Allen be waiting for her.